Wednesday, March 28, 2012 Losing Custody Of Child Poem, My Lost Love, My Lost Child I, too gave up a little girl for adoption. . The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want. Psalm 23. Its been a little over a year now. I enrolled in parenting classes, and I am taking drug classes also, because my ex-sister in law told the police that I was on the floor drugged up, and my daughter claims she told the police that all this was not true. All I can do is get better and look to the future. Though not required by law, its to your advantage to hire a lawyer to represent you in any child custody case including one where there are allegations of depression. I know I will get my children back soon but I am only 3 months postpartum and I am craving my baby really badly. In 2016. When we had our children with us, they learned from our behavior more than from our words. I have the certificate of adoption with her name on it. You might believe you don't measure up to other people in terms of looks, age, or weight. Hi I lost my 4 youngest and ironically Im getting back the child that originally called on me. 6. But guess what! To several children. You can find a lot of help there. My grief and anger has nowhere to go. I know what it is like to feel hopeless what it is like to be spiritually dead, to have a clean mind and not know how to react to life. In some cases, the mood can be masked by excessive physical complaints. You are a beacon of hope and a bright light showing others the way. She defended him! Monica Rands-Preuss is licensed both in California and Washington. ask for another one. I called my caseworkers superviser supervisor. How to cope with the death of a child? Will you be there for him at least make an offer of being there for him? Help me please. The person should have time to cry, to mourn as much as it will be necessary. I was the victim of domestic violence by my second husband and CPS handed my kids over to their biological father. The divorced parents had joint custody of their three children and equal parenting time. Our CPS case cant progress because my husband has criminal charges that were brought against him and if he doesnt try to fight them, he loses his job and we lose our income. Please read your states laws about families and custody decisions. I dont know where else to turn. In fact the stress and grief of the separation and loss of custody is related to an increased risk of alcohol abuse. THIS IS WISE CO.TEXAS. Im thankful I found this site. I pray for you daily. Of course, if the diagnosis reveals a dangerous form of depression, its probably in the best interests of the child for the other parent to have full custody. We can glorify God by using our experiences to encourage others and to fight for the right of parents to raise their own children as we see fit unless of course, there is actual criminal activity going on. Its the worst feeling in the world to be hopeless & to not know where to turn because your stuck. With more money you could hire a private detective to find them when theyre older, or launch an all-out media and social-media campaign to find them when theyre teenagers. I missed ten years with my two oldest daughters during their childhoods. No matter what. Divorce. Lets accept the parts weve had in and move forward. Exercise. My kids never needed anything even if my mom had to help from time to time which she did often without me asking. Well much to my horror CPS stepped in and turned everything around on me and destroyed my family. My Lil girl is 4 and my lil boy is 3 im going through it so hard i take walk clean the house but nothing really help it feel like my whole life turned upside down i cant sleep like i used to can anybody help. I am hopeless. What can I do to get my kids back??! Did cps take them and you were able to get them back or you are able to see them through the foster parents. Your baby knows you and knows somethings wrong, that you love him and that hes been moved. We were forced to give up our rights by cps. Your therapist can also help you assimilate with these changes and engage with your life beyond the divorce and custody arrangements in ways that are healthy. . Someone please reach out. One day we will ALL enjoy our children when they are adults and we need to work on ourselves as much as we can to be a stable, strong force in their lives! They say they are protecting the kids but really theyre hurting them more. My daughters story is not going to be one that allows her to be felt sorry for or that gives her an excuse to not reach her full potential. All our medications and issues were exposed- sinus problems, migraines and even allergies! Anything worth having is worth fighting for and my children are my everything. He came out on top. This is battle for our children, and grandchildren. I dont know what happened to him and Im really depressed. Although the mental illness alone does not automatically disqualify you from custody, an active co-occurring drug addiction might. I am complying with all their stuff as well. documented young children's vulnerability to depression after parental . I miss them so much i cant give up i did for a minute i did self destruct to almost death. This is usually due to the circumstances of the loss of someone. Lawyers are paid by the state and dont do anything. So heart broken. But the case has been going on for so long, if the children are with their fathers now the judge will probably want to keep them in a stable place. Sometimes parents are not sure if their child is depressed. Lexi Behrndt. My daughter is now with her father and adopted by his wife. Every state has different laws about how old a child must be before they can help decide where they will live. Just stumbled upon this website. The nature of each disorder is vastly different. 2. After i was given the papers by the police officer that stated i was to give my child to her grandmother who is a drunk and a drug dealer. Monica has years of experience working with families in transition. In the first stage, the person does not believe in the truth of the loss. I just read what my next experience will be once I stop breathing. Please use the comment section below to let us know what works for you. Prepare for recurring grief. You have to fight. I had been given the impression that after my return my children would be able to see me on the weekends no supervision just me and them. CPS sided with her, stating she made a bad choice. The Optimistminds editorial team is made up of psychologists, psychiatrists and mental health professionals. You enjoyed being a parent your love for your babies show since you openly expose the hurt your in. We may lose this battle, but the victory is already won. I have to think that theyll soon be 18 and able to make their own decisions!! I too am in the same boat. "It was not death, for I stood up" by Emily Dickinson Excerpt: It was not Death, for I stood up, And all the Dead, lie down It was not Night, for all the Bells Put out their Tongues, for Noon. My kids were taken because of excessive discipline. I used my depression to my advantage by turning it into anger. Ask your therapist about seeing a psychiatrist. I was paralyzed from neck down. Thanks for this uplifting article/post. I also started a Facebook page called INTERTWINE. My kids are my life if it wasnt for them there is no telling were id be. 5. In the mean time, be the best mommy you can by setting the right example. So please get out your Bible and read these stories! If anyone has any kind of advise on this please help. Lost life my heart goes out to you. I believe all parental authority over the child totally ends at age 1`8, It can in some circumstances be younger, if the child petitions the court to be emancipated!! I havent read them yet-the first is a workbook-but I think the second one is better-so check them out. I just loved my family too much. I want to share my story of hope! Try to get plenty of sunlight. I have been contemplating suicide for several days, even going to the point of holding the pills in my hand and writing out instructions on what to do with my body. I got counseling & one of the biggest things the counselor suggested was a trunk. 5). Please pray for me and my babies as I will all of you. Thats the past, and now Im happy and through the trauma. eight 1 six 6 four 5 four 1 five 2 If I cannot answer, please let me know that you found my number on FightCPS, and I will get back with you ASAP! Please if there is any one that can guide me I need legal representation urgently!! I know who wins, and I know what side I am on. Than another knock, I was informed that due to an past history of drug use, domestic abuse, married to a felon, and un healed psychological stress issues, grief, and no job or reliable transportation. I never got to know my son he was taken from me an hour after I gave birth to him. Please dont ever loose faith in God. I am in arizona, over a month ago my six children were taken by cps. Im so tired of people asking why arent you ever happy. My children were never abused and always with their mom prior. You can also take effort to build positive relationships amongst friends and family at the same time, if it is possible- keeping an open channel between you and the other parent can also be helpful. After over a year of my a busive ex had an order of protection for a year but had the money to file a motion almost every week with crazy lies, snazzy attorney while no child support being temporarily ordered while I took care of all their needs. Required fields are marked *. Anything you create is never yours. The better looking & mannered our children are the more unlikely to never get them back as they can make more money as well as adopt them out faster. They took her because of a rush to judgment. Anger expressed in a healthy way is my defense mechanism to keep going on with life. I have no advice of how to cope and i dont want to share my ugly story (theyre a dime a dozen) I just want you to know that I AM PROUD OF YOU. I was squalling like a baby myself. Talk to your doctor about your depression. Hi. Ive been to 3 different ones and finally i got the paper work I need for my Dcfs case. This has to be stopped! Get back to me when you can. Seniors may experience severe grief-related symptoms stemming from loneliness and a loss of a sense of purpose. Featured Shared Story I know God sees us through our trials, and sometimes we never know why. Ask for others to pray for you too. Nor does calling us, emailing us, chatting us, or otherwise contacting us. I am 23 have been a single mom since my oldest my 5 yr old daughter was born. Pls go to my website and click on SIGN THE PETITION. Tooken the second time because one of my babys ended up in the hospital and passed away. In your case, since you had your tubes tied and dont expect to have more children, it would probably be best to go to the hearing to try to defend your right to parent this one child many other parents do sign their rights away to avoid the TPR label (which would affect future children as well.) Life is lonely and hard but please do not give up. Finish college, and be part of the solution to bring this madness to an end. I thank God for my little ray of sunshine back in my life. Stop! That was long ago (dark ages I guess) in the early 1980s. When I seen them again a worker just laughed about it. I need someone to pray that I get my babies back. 7 Warning Signs Your Marriage May End in Divorce. If not. Do it to try to have a good relationship with the adopters, to be able to see your grandchild at least once a year, maybe around Christmas time. This could be a therapist, counselor, or support group. But my daughter wasnt addicted to anything when she was born they tested her & everything. Please help! I was devastated !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Me, you and all the Mothers and Fathers on here are ALL in that same dark place with you! If I ever follow through with my plan, I will leave a note to each of my children telling them it was never their fault and Im sorry that I failed them. For nothing in this world can replace a child you've had to lose. When losing an adult child, the grief can be compounded by guilt, by the loss of a friend, by the contemplation of our own mortality, and by the reality that the end of life is perceived as progressively less tragic the older a person gets. If you are unable to cope with your own emotions after the death of a child, consult a psychologist. I put some ideas for TPRd parents on this site. These laws are very complicated and you put your parental rights at risk if you dont have legal counsel in your corner. fatigue. I just got a car and am now working. Most parents who lose custody of their children were NOT drug or alcohol abusers, or neglectful, or abusive in any way, shape or form of their children. I have been in and out of hospitals for suicidal ideation. Dont turn from God when you need him most. A Law to Put a Dent in CPS Child Trafficking tells the story of how Stephen K., Californias original activist against CPS, worked with a legislator to get better laws introduced to the state social services statutes. For an emailed notificationof new articles,enter your email address here: Copyright 2023 Linda Jo Martin, site owner, By continuing to use the site, you agree to the use of cookies. Just read what my next experience will be necessary because of a child you & # x27 ve... Had to help from time to time which she did often without me asking you dont have counsel. Violence by my second husband and cps handed my kids back?? the counselor suggested was a.! 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